Angels
by strawberry-kisses1
Summary: Based on Amanda Perez's song "Angel" very sad and bittersweet short story please R


_Authors notes: A one shot HG/SS story. I think I may resign myself to these until I can figure out a good story that is easy and simple and will attract more readers. This story is loosly based on the Amanda Perez song "Angel" I'll post the lyrics as a second chapter or something._

_These characters aren't mine, they belong to JK Rowling. And a great job she does with 'em too. _

  
  


_On to the story....._

  
  


**Sweat and blood were thick in the air that Halloween evening. Screams of the innocent penetrated the air in accompaniment with screams of the not-so-innocent. The small room was lit with bright, unfriendly lights that seared into Hermione's eyes, which she tried to keep clenched shut, but she just couldn't let that happen. Her normally bushy brown hair was plastered to her forehead and the moisture that kept it in place had turned it from chestnut brown to a much deeper, chocolate color. As she gasped for breath, she could feel the blood rush to her face again and it's uncomfortable heat was most unwelcome. Muffled voices of several people she didn't know tried to help her, give her some instruction, but she half didn't understand them and half didn't want to heed their advice. She had gotten this far on her own, what did she need these people for? **

* * *

**Snape had been pacing up and down his small rooms all day since he had heard the news. Of course this meant he was basically running in circles due to the small size of his chambers and his long strides. He stopped for a moment by a roaring fireplace and cracked his knuckles. Normally the fireplace wasn't lit, but he was in no mood for lectures from Dumbledore just sprouting from the hearth. He began to bite the tip of what was left of his thumbnail. Although Severus usually had nicely manicured nails for a man, even more nice for a Potions Master, in the past 10 hours, he'd chewed them away to nothing. With a light stomp on his antique Persian rug, he turned, as stiff as a soldier and continued his march onward to his bed, turning again, back into his sitting room. Turning again. He was beginning to wear down a strip of wood in his bedrooms that wasn't covered in carpets or rugs. Severus sat down on his bed and scratched at his palms nervously, although he didn't know why. He shouldn't have been so worried about her. He'd never see her again, but it felt almost like a duty to worry. A burden she was long after she had rejected him, although, her rejection was entirely his own fault. **

**Almost a year ago Severus Snape had left his sleeping lover alone in the night. No note, no word, nothing, after 2 years. He couldn't tell her later, when he had asked her for forgiveness, that he felt that night, looking down at her, that he was ruining her life. He couldn't tell her that he thought he was the worst thing that had ever happened to her, and that he loved her so much he wanted to leave her. So she would have a better life. After almost 4 months when he had come crawling back to ask her for her forgiveness, he couldn't tell her any of that, and so he got what he deserved. A door slammed in his face. She had left Hogwarts long before that point though. Most mysteriously as well, it was just one moment she wasn't at breakfast anymore. **

**He sank his worn face into his hands and tried to rake his body for a sob. Some sign of feeling that he was still a man, not a monster his students thought he was, but nothing came. He swatted a piece of stray black hair that had found a place in front of his obsidian eyes and sighed deeply. He cursed under his breath at Albus Dumbledore, the Headmaster, for presenting him such news at all. He didn't care anymore, he shouldn't have. But he did. He knew it, and Albus knew it and the entire staff at Hogwarts knew it. And it pissed him off to no end. **

* * *

**Lines of worry crossed Hermione's face, making her look much older than her 25 years. She looked over at Ginny, her best friend, in fact she was nearly her only friend left. Ron had stopped speaking to her after she had broken the news about her and Severus to him a few years earlier and Harry just wasn't around. Ginny was most disappointed in this, and had put off their wedding several times because of his constant moving because of Quidditch. She had once almost made him choose before realizing that she might not like to hear his answer to that, so she remained faithful and patient for him. **

**When Ginny returned her look with one of awe and relief, Hermione sighed a deep sigh and rested her head. All she wanted to do was sleep, but as the tall, handsome mid-husband(?) handed to her a small, writhing, swaddled bundle, she knew that her chances of sleeping were now few and far between. Ginny looked over her shoulder and sighed a sigh of relief that he had been blessed with his mother's button nose. Hermione's weary eyes looked around absently, as if awaiting some type of instruction, as nurses no longer needed began leaving the room. The look in her eyes screamed **

**'Help! I don't know what to do!'**

**and Ginny saw it. She couldn't offer any guidance to her though, she couldn't help. She was watching after so many nieces and nephews that helping after her friends child would leave her no time to herself, or to Harry when he was in town. All Hermione had was a big, lumbering Great Dane and a small house in the country which didn't even have electricity. **

**"What are you going to call him?" Ginny asked in a whispered voice.**

* * *

**Severus had fallen into a half-way peaceful slumber when Albus burst into his rooms at 2 o'clock in the morning. Despite the early, or was it late, hour, he was grinning from ear to ear and his blue eyes seemed to sparkle more than normal.**

**"What is it Albus?" Snape asked groggily.**

**"Dmitri Allister; 9 pounds and 22 and a half inches." Albus was still glowing as Snape's eyes rolled into the back of his head and he passed out.  
"Severus? Are you alright?" He looked over him and nudged him softly with his foot. Albus sighed deeply and placed a blanket over his friend, as he wondered if this had been the right thing to do. He certainly hadn't meant for it to be the first news of Hermione he had had in such a long period of time, but it was and Severus was very, very shocked. Severus didn't know if he should have run right out of the Great Hall at once and go to her side, or to stay and worry all night, like had chosen to do. What type of role would he have in the child's life? Was it even his child? Did he want it? Did he want to be with her? Did he want to share? Was he capable of loving something so small, and helpless and help it mature into adulthood? He didn't know the answer to any of these questions, and part of him didn't want to have to deal with these questions. **

**As the sun rose and it was evident that Albus was long gone, Severus stirred on his floor, his back aching and head hurting from the fall he had taken the night before. He wished he had amnesia briefly before he thought of the last bit of information brought to him by the Headmaster.**

**  
"Dmitri Allister." He said to himself, repeating it over and over again, letting the words form in his mouth again and again. 'At least it wasn't some stupid Latin name beginning with 'S' ' he thought to himself with a chuckle. He had missed breakfast that morning, but as he went out into the hall he realized that he had missed lunch as well, and now it was almost time for dinner. He ran his fingers through his thick main of dark hair, attempting to make it look reasonable as he approached the Great Hall and made his way between Ravenclaw and Gryffindor tables. He looked up to see Minerva McGonagall raising an eyebrow at him and smiling a thin-lipped congratulatory smile. As he took his seat she came over and sat next to him so she could talk to him. **

**"Ginny owled me all of the information Severus. I must say that I am very surprised and very happy for both of you."**

**"There's only one of us you need to be happy for." She responded, taking a long drink from his goblet.**

**"What, what do you mean?" Minerva asked, horrified, her hand at her throat.**

**"Hermione and I haven't spoken in many, many months. She will never speak to me again I fear." **

**"But, she's coming tomorrow evening. We've set up a port-key for her and Ali, that's what she's calling him. Surely you can talk to her then."**

**"I don't even know if the child is mine Minerva. She broke it off before I found out about it."**

**"Him, Severus. Him." She replied coldly and removed herself from his presence. She had no desire to speak to such a cold-hearted and cruel man.**

* * *

**"Ginny. He's going to be there tonight." Hermione choked out as she packed her small bag, leaving out a pair of socks that were to be used as a portkey for her and Ali. **

**"You'll have to face him sometime you know." Ginny shrugged and smiled, placing her small hands on Hermione's shoulders.**

**"I love him so much."**

**"If you do then why don't you forgive him?" She asked, throwing her hands into the air.**

**"I can't. He abandoned me and couldn't give me a good reason for it. What if I show up tonight with Ali, ready to forgive and he does it again? Only this time it won't hurt just me." Hermione tried to reason with Ginny, while also arguing the point to herself. **

**"What do you think seeing his son will do to him? Seeing Ali and knowing you'll never let him anywhere near Ali." He should have thought about that before.**

**"He didn't know before! I don't think he knew until I owled McGonagall and told her, Hermione. And that's a low blow, especially for someone like you." Ginny raised her voice above a low whisper, which caused little Ali to stir in his cot and make a wrinkled and contorted newborn face that said he didn't want to be disturbed. **

**"Ginny, I just want to get to Hogwarts and get this over and done with so I can go home and raise my son." Hermione concluded and picked up little Ali, all tightly wrapped in his blue blanket and grabbed the socks.**

* * *

**Hermione's head span as she tried to regain her balance outside the Great Hall. It was 7 o'clock, just in time for dinner to be served. She dropped the baby bags over by the doors, and opened them as much as she could with one arm. At that moment everyone stopped eating and turned to look at their ex-Library Assistant. Her chair had been returned to the table in the front and she smiled a wide smile of self-satisfaction and true happiness for being back 'home'. She made her way up to the front in stunned silence and gave Severus a curt nod as she sat down next to him, child in arms. Severus made no attempts whatsoever to recognize the child, and returned the nod and stared into his soup all night. **

**"Oh Hermione! Motherhood certainly agrees with you!" Minerva came running up to her, kissing her on the head and taking Ali away. Dropping back his head covering revealed a mess of black curls and the deepest eyes to match. "Look that that all that hair Hermione! Severus, from the eyes up he's all yours." Minerva said flatly, and Severus didn't stir. "But thankfully he has your nose, Hermione." As the drafty castle became apparent to little Ali he began to scowl and sneer at McGonagall for removing his blanket from his head. "Oh, look at that face. Yes Severus, he's yours alright. Look at the scowl." McGonagall smiled and handed him back to his mother. "If you need any help you know where to find me." **

**"Yes of course." Hermione replied as Minerva sat back down at her seat on Dumbledore's left. Hermione began to gently sway her arms back and forth, trying to keep Ali asleep. He had been fed, not a half hour ago, and she wanted dinner to go as smooth and quietly as possible. Severus let his eyes wander to the sleeping infant in Hermione's arms. Minerva was right, he realized, as Ali opened his eyes for a moment and seemed to recognize him, before closing them again. This little person was definitely his son. He felt a lump grow in his throat and in an unprecedented show of emotion, that he didn't even realize he was capable of, he reached out and stroked the cheeks of his son. _His_ son. **

* * *

**Hermione was lucky that dinner had gone off without a hitch, but as soon as everyone had filed out of the Great Hall, she was left with a wailing son who needed to be fed. Severus mumbled something to her and she rose to follow him, much to Minerva's surprise, considering the conversation she had had with Snape the evening before. Hermione followed Severus down into the dungeons and directly to his chambers. The warm glow of the fire heated his rooms quite a bit and caused Hermione to completely remove her robes whilst feeding Ali. Snape sat down opposite her in a brown leather chair, watching intently.**

**"You called me down here for a reason you know." She started, with a cold tone in her voice she knew he could match.**

**"I wanted to talk." he replied without any frigidity. **

**"I gathered as much. What about?"**

**"What do you think?" He asked her in a hostile voice.**

**"I don't want you in my life." She told him, knowing she had hit a sensitive spot. "You left me and for that, I've realized that I don't want you anymore. In my life or Ali's." Snape sat quietly in his chair for several minutes and just watched her. She went on as usual, as if he wasn't there. "I leave tomorrow." She finally told him, after a not-so-awkward silence. He nodded quietly and she rose to leave. "Goodbye Severus."**

* * *

**Early the next morning Hermione was awake and ready to leave. A steady patter of rain beat against the windows that surrounded the front doors of Hogwarts. As she said her final goodbye's and opened the doors to leave she turned, with tears in her eyes to face Severus, standing on the stairs, watching her leave. She searched his eyes, and it didn't take anyone special to notice the hurt and longing in them. Then she quickly realized what her own eyes must have shown him and she quickly looked away. Holding her head high, and stepping out of Hogwarts, Hermione Granger never looked back again.**

  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  



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